Mommy Moment

I didn’t go to work yesterday because I had to settle the school requirements to make Amber’s enrollment official.

I send her off to school and fetch her afterwards. 

When we got home, she came to me and hugged me. While hugging me, we had this short but really touching conversation that made my heart melt (and ache).

Amber: I’M SO HAPPY, Mommy!

Mommy: Talaga? Why are you happy?

Amber: Because........ you-are-here!

Aww, isn’t she sweet? But I was left speechless.

I wanted to promise her that I will be there every day to send her to school or every time she comes home from school. Sadly, I can’t.... yet.

Sigh. The pains of a working-mom. L

I Care to Communicate

Mama: Be careful Amber, you might fall.

Amber: I don’t care.

Napalingon ako ng bonggang-bongga nung narinig ko yung sagot ng bagets.

This is what I’ve been telling the Hubby. That sometimes, I’m scared of what she picks up on TV, especially when we are not around.

I immediately called her attention.

Me: Amber, what you said is not nice.

Amber: I don’t care, Mommy.

Nyay, inulit pa talaga. Patience...

Me: Amber, only bad girls say that. Do you want to be a bad girl?

For an instant, I wanted to take back what I asked her, thinking what if she says ‘yes’.

Amber: No! Good girl ako eh.

Buti na lang. Sigh of relief!

Me: So don’t say those words again.

Amber: Okay, Mommy.

Me: Promise?

Amber: Yes.

After that, I have not heard her say it again and hoped not ever. Hearing it from a kid feels so wrong.

I guess I really cannot filter everything that my child hears and sees since I can’t be with her the entire time because I work. But knowing how to talk to her makes the difference. I hope that we will be able to maintain an open communication as she grows. ^_^

Yun lang. Thanks!

Those Poor Toys

After several pleadings, this has become my mantra every time I need Amber to do something (eg, take a bath, eat, etc...):

“Amber, do you want me to throw away your toys?”

It’s wrong, I know. But it is the most effective approach at the moment. So far, I have not thrown any of her toys. And I’m glad that she hasn’t tested her limits in this area yet.

How about you Mommies, how do you convince your toddlers to do what they are supposed to do? I am so willing to try other more acceptable means than throwing threats against her unknowing toys. L

Parental Guidance

We’ve always been very careful in the movies and TV shows we watch whenever Amber is around, especially when she began being gaya-gaya.

Ngapala, she has this very funny way of responding whenever we tell her she’s gaya-gaya. In her most malambing way, she’ll reply, “ano baaaahhh”. I swear, her voice sounds so flirtatious. San na naman kaya nya napulot yun?!?!

We were watching a comedy film, which title I forgot (ako yung makakalimutin di ba?) and thought it harmless when all of a sudden a character said “SH!+”. We didn’t give attention until the little girl, who we thought was all absorbed in browsing her book said, “sh!+”. Ay, nawindang kaming lahat. We didn’t know what to do. Nobody even thought of telling her that it is a bad word. Basta natameme kaming lahat. It was unexpected talaga.

I know we were wrong not to tell her right there and then that she shouldn’t say it, but we all thought it’ll be forgotten after a while.

THERE WE GO AGAIN, UNDERESTIMATING THE KID!

Then her book fell and she uttered the 4-letter word again! Hay, so kaka! That time we were already thinking straight and explained to her that what she said was a bad word and she shouldn’t keep on saying it. Mukhang naintindihan naman kasi sabi na lang nya, “bad word”.

Lesson learned: Always always practice Parental Guidance when you are around a quick-witted toddler! 

Parents & Child-Care Providers

It used to bother me that Amber might prefer her yaya or whoever that she is with most of the time over her working mommy. I worry that it would hurt my feelings if she runs after somebody else than she would to me. I imagine the pain that I would feel if she calls out to someone else than to me.

I’ve heard a lot of these from fellow moms and how they were hurt from the experience.

I began to worry about it, too.

Until last weekend... Tita Renee had to leave earlier so she could attend an anticipated mass. As she is about to go out of the gate, Amber looked for her and went out of the house. When she saw that Tita was outside the gate, she called for her. I sensed the panic in her voice. Then she started to wail when she realized that Tita is indeed leaving.

I couldn’t pacify her. She was crying so hard despite my hugging her. She wanted Tita Renee back.

Tita, upon hearing Amber’s cries, went back inside and held Amber. She instantly stopped crying.

I stopped and assessed my feelings. Was I hurt? Did I feel the pain of rejection from my own daughter?

............

Surprisingly, I was not! Instead, I felt glad.

In all honesty, I can say that I felt good about it because seeing how Amber cried for Tita meant one thing to me... that Tita is giving Amber the love and proper care that she needs. Di ba nga, she went back for Amber when she heard her cry?

I learned from somewhere that children have keen senses. They know if a person cares for them or otherwise. Thus, they react similarly towards that person.

This incident made me feel better leaving Amber with Tita when the Hubby and I are at work. At least I know that my baby is in good hands and is properly taken cared of. Because of that, I appreciate Tita Renee the more!

And don’t I feel threatened that Amber would want Tita more than me? No, I’m not. I am and I will always be her Mom. No matter how close she is to someone else at the moment, I’m sure she will always turn to me when she needs her Mommy. That, I am very certain of! ^_^

Happy Buttons!

Image from www.zazzle.com

As parents, there will always be a time when we have to deal with tantrums or bad moods. Here are useful tips that would ruin a toddler's bad mood. ^_^

Taken from magicalchildhood dot com.

~Monkey hugs!
A bear hug is nice, but a monkey hug is a guaranteed mood lifter. Pick up the child, hold on tight, and bend down quickly so they're hanging upside down and grinning. Shout out "monkey hug!" with every swoop down, stay a few seconds, and then swing them back up. As long as you hold their heads firmly too and do it very gently, even babies get a case of the giggles (OLDER babies of course!).

~Happy buttons
You have to look really hard for happy buttons. Kids have them somewhere but the tricky things are always moving around! If your little one is particularly sad or cranky, announce that you're going to have to find their happy button. With big smiles, hold out one finger and begin poking bellies, the backs of knees, even ears in search of that elusive happy button. Make sure to be very, very silly and not too rough if your child is particularly sensitive. Keep searching till you see a smile break and then announce that you've found it! You can also shriek and run in mock fear of your own happy button being pushed. Kids love to reciprocate!

~Turn into a loon
It doesn't matter how you do it, but acting like a complete idiot is the quickest way to cheer up a child. Pretend to suddenly be terrified of the oven mitt and plead for your little one to save you from it (make sure it's something they're not going to turn fearful of too-- so silly stuff). Announce something like "I think I have a chicken on my head" and wait for your child to argue. Call the cat a hippopotamus or ask your little one if her name is Humperdink. When he says no, ask if he's sure. Then guess it's Waddledip.... you get the idea.

~Pour on the mommy love
Sometimes kids just need to be absolutely babied and adored for a few minutes. If they seem particularly down, try telling them they seem awfully sad and asking if they'd like to come sit in your lap or get a hug. Some days you just need someone to feel bad for you and treat you gently. One night Victoria was a cranky terror until I had her lie down across me and I patted her back and just said "Poor Victoria, poor Victoria" over and over again. When I stopped, she told me to keep saying it! She fell right asleep like that, finally secure that somebody cared how unfair it was to have to share with a baby sister or whatever it was that upset her.

~Turn on the tunes
Most of us have songs that lift our spirits and kids are no different. Oldies music is often good for this, as are all different kid songs. It works for the grown-ups too. When I'm getting cranky with the kids I put on Tom Petty's "Pack up the Plantation" CD and pretty soon we're all jumping around singing "even the losers get lucky sometimes!".

~Offer magical happy treats
My husband, Daryl, gives Victoria invisible happy juice when she's down. I've been known to also offer happy berries (frozen blueberries). My only advice is don't make candy a happy treat and don't talk about happy pills, for health and safety reasons.

~Just ask
Strange as it sounds, sometimes it works to just get down on your child's level and ask if she can snap out of it. When Victoria (30 months) is crying and sad, I often just stoop down and first offer my condolences. Then I say I'd kinda like to do something (things she likes like reading books, taking a bubble bath or doing crafts) but I think she's too sad to enjoy it. I ask if she thinks she's ready to wipe her tears and be happy, and she almost always agrees. With great dramatics, she wipes her tears and breaks into a grin. She says "Now I'm happy!" and we go off to do our fun thing.

Always have these ready, dear mommies and daddies. Sometimes, we just can't tell when we will be needing them. ^_^